10 thing to make you rethink the iPad

There's been a lot of buzz about the iPad latetly, and with the first "real" reviews coming out I thought I would throw a few cents in the pool, and share some of the things an iPad doesn't do or have.

Interestingly enough my inspiration was this post here.
From which I will take number one.

• One Battery, and you're stuck with it. Seriously you can't upgrade your battery, you get what you get and if you ask David Pogue of the New York times he'd tell you that Apple lied. They promise up to ten hours of use, but he easily got twelve. Apple Fail.

• No Dos Prompt, any power user will tell you that if you really want to get the most out of a machine you have to have a command prompt but all apple gives you is these pictures. I mean seriously what does it even mean? a floating envelope? Give me a Dos prompt!
• No cords. I myself am quite fond of cords, I'm just now starting to figure out which ones go where, and they help me know where my stuff is. Where's my computer? Oh here it is attached to this here cable. Phew, thank goodness for cords.
• In one or two years there will be an even better model. Of all the audacious things to do, Apple is releasing a device this week that everybody knows will be obsolete in five or ten years. And they tend to follow a schedule, so we already know that next year there's like a 99% chance that there will be a new iPad and it will be even faster, and more better.
• There aren't even a million apps. In fact there aren't even 200,000. That's like .00003 apps per person, and that's just not enough. We want more!
• It doesn't come with Iphone OS 4.0. In fact They're going to make us wait until July, and then we don't even get a choice. Like it or not, they're giving us a newer, faster, better version of their operating system. And it will probably include something like multitasking. Hey I have a hard enough time concentrating on one thing. LEAVE THE IPAD ALONE!
• You know what bugs me the most? It doesn't have a pager. I mean those were the good ole' days. Anyone could contact you, anytime. All you got was a number, and then it was like a treasure hunt, first you try to figure out who's calling, then you get to find a phone. And crisp clear alerts. I mean these messages might be very important, I don't want some non-obtrusive sound to play to tell me that I have a message, I want it to be unmistakable.
• Beta Max. Beta Max was way better than VHS, but is there a slot for a BetaMax tape? no, no there isn't. In fact there's not even a place to put your VHS tapes. It's unconscionable.
• Dot Matrix compatibility. Now I don't know for certain, but I bet Apples not going to support dot matrix printers with this thingy. But seriously there were hundreds of thousands of those printers made, and almost everybody has purchased at least one of them. Apple Probable Fail.
• Farmville. Yeah that's right I said it no Farmville. No Farmville, and not fishville, and no Heroes vs. Villains, no Vampire Wars, I mean what else are people going to do at 2:30 in the morning. Seriously nothing is open.
• Free iPad, no Free iPad. I know there are thousands of sites that would tell me that I just won a free iPad, but no one who has one will ever know. Those ads won't even play on an iPad. What is this socialism? only one iPad per person? I should be able to here that lady just like everybody else when she says "Congratulations you may be eligible for a FREE IPAD!" Not Fair! Not Right!!
• It doesn't work with the Apple Magic Mouse. I mean have you seen that thing, it's like a mouse with a track pad built right in. It's probably the greatest mouse ever created, notwithstanding its diminutive size. One touch screen is not enough you never know when you may need multiple multi-touch surfaces.
• World Peace. That's right you're one of the freakin' biggest companies in the world, and we expect more from you, surely this cause is important enough for you to focus on. It's not like this is a new thing either, we've been asking for it since before you were born. You've had like thirty years. And you've barely even started on it. TOTAL APPLE FAIL!!!

Here's hoping that you'll learn from your mistakes.
We are to say the least disappointed.